White cards:

#1    Forgetting to eat, and consequently dying. (defect card, see condition description above)

#2    Endless Ninjas

#3    Separate drinking fountains for dark elves

#4    Getting bitten by a radioactive spider and then battling leukemia for 30 years.

#5    Running out of stamina

#6    Achieving 500 actions per minute

#7    Getting bitch slapped by Dhalsim.

#8    Charging up all the way.

#9    Eating a pizza in the street to gain health.

#10   A grumpy old Harrison Ford who'd rather be doing anything else.

#11   Yoshi's huge egg-laying cloaca

#12   A homemade cum-stained Star Trek uniform

#13   Loading from a previous save

#14   The collective wail of every Magic player suddenly realizing that they've spent hundreds of dollars on pieces of cardboard.

#15   Ser Jorah Mormont's cerulean-blue balls.

#16   KHAAAAAAAAAN!

#17   Tapping Serra Angel.

#18   A fully-dressed female videogame character.

#19   The depression that ensues after catching them all.

#20   Taking 2d6 emotional damage.

#21   Sharpening a foam broadsword on a foam whetstone.

#22   Offering sexual favors for an ore and a sheep.

#23   The C*ck Ring of Alacrity.

#24   Stuffing my balls into a Sega Genesis and pressing the power button.

Black cards:

#25   __________________ achievement unlocked.

#26   What's the latest bullshit that's troubling this quaint fantasy town?

#27   (Heavy breathing)  Luke, I am _____________.

#28   ______________ is way better in __________ mode.

#29   What made Spock cry?

#30   Press down, down, left, right, B to unleash ____________.  (the kraken?)

Box expansion: (Have 2 copies of each unless indicated)  Please email with card listing info (#) if ordering a card from this expansion.

1- A box without hinges, key, or lid, yet golden treasure inside is hid (an egg)

2- The J15 Patriot Assault Box

3- Something that looks like a box but turns out to be a crate.

4- A box-shaped man.

5- Two midgets sh*tt*ng in a box.

6- An alternate universe in which boxes store things inside of people.

7- A box that is conscious and wishes it weren't a box.

8- A man-shaped box.

9- A world without boxes.

10- A outbreak of smallbox.

11- A boxing match with a giant box.  (One copy only)

12- A box within a box.

13- Boxing up my feelings.

14- The Boxcar Children.

15- A box of biscuits, a box of mixed biscuits, and a biscuit mixer.

16- A box.

17- Pandora's vagina.

18- Being a motherf*cking box.  (One copy only)

19- Former President George W. Box

20- A falcon with a box on its head.

21- The biggest, blackest d*ck.